Steve's Testimony

”Come spark the parts in me that all but died, jump start my heart and wake the sleeper inside.”  - Toby Mac

I had struggled with fear for most my life.  In fact, you probably would have seen a picture of me had you looked up the word fear in the dictionary.  My days revolved around fear.  I feared how others perceived me at my job.  I feared that I was not being a loving husband and supportive father.  I feared that I was a failure in the eyes of God and had been rejected.  I started to isolate myself from other people.  I feared that I would be considered inferior if I reached out to anybody for help.  I became apathetic towards just about everything imaginable.  I was merely slumbering through the motions.

 

In January 2008, my extended family at New Beginnings Church helped me begin to discover that both God and they had not given up on me.  They reminded me that God loved me and wanted to help me overcome my fear and awaken me from my slumber.  I started to recognize that I could not fight this battle on my own.  I needed to stop being stubborn and reach out to my brothers and sisters in Christ.  It was decision time.  Would I continue down the same road of despair I had been traveling, or would I choose to completely surrender all areas of my life to God?

 

That Sunday in January 2008, with God and my New Beginnings Family cheering me on, I made a decision that completely altered my way of life.  I made the decision to journey down the road to spiritual healing.  I humbly admitted to God that I had allowed fear to rule my every move.  I stepped out on faith and asked God to help me take a stand against my fears.  I felt my confidence beginning to grow, and I started to awaken from my slumber at that very moment.  I learned that God had not rejected me and did not view me as a failure.  He viewed me as His child and loved me like a father loves his son.  God helped me to recognize He did not expect me to be perfect.  He simply wanted me to follow Him in obedience and give Him my best.

 

God has helped me undergo a metamorphosis during the last eighteen months.  I recognize now that I need to make Him the number one priority in my life.  I have experienced a strength and joy that I have never known.  I admit that I still deal with fear at times.  However, I no longer allow myself to be held captive by my fears.  In fact, look up freedom in that dictionary.  I bet you find my picture there.